Australia is a cunt of a nation for takeaway/takeout/and overall general dining.

[Reggie Essent]

Eat eaten pizzas from everywhere. Chicago is better than NY but Philly is the best. They all shit over west coast though.

I dunno.  People out west put weird shit like pineapple and avocado on pizza.  That's sacra-fucken-ligious.

[Frood]

I dunno.  People out west put weird shit like pineapple and avocado on pizza.  That's sacra-fucken-ligious.

Avocado on a chicken and bacon pizza is good... but the avocado doesn't break the one cardinal rule.

"There is only room for one fruit on the pizza and that's the tomato sauce. Fin. End"

And yeah.... West Coast people are pizza retarded.... stuff like gluten free unmilled wholegrain crusts with dry roasted okra, artisan mayonnaise, baby pineapple and kiwi berry slices, and diseccated used Pampers from a discarded anchor baby w/a sweet and sour marmalade liberally doused over that 'pie travesty'...

Basically Prog Pizza.

They do that in the trendy areas of Australia too.... and charge 45 bucks per 16 inch pizza.

I order the Prog Supremes and have them remove 6-10 ingredients until it resembles a real pizza because they charge you 2-3 bucks for any ingredient you add (including black pepper) but don't charge you for removals.

I'm like:

"Please take out the sparkler dust, thong footwear, kale, fake meat, fake cheese, any fruit, any barbecue sauce, rhubarb, artichokes, and gender queer studies tampons, thnx"...

Then I add that if I find a single piece of pineapple on my pie, I'm going to take a massive dookie on the it and throw it into their kitchen.....which sometimes backfires if the kid behind the counter turns red, winks, and whispers "yes please".

[caskur]

Avocado on a chicken and bacon pizza is good... but the avocado doesn't break the one cardinal rule.

"There is only room for one fruit on the pizza and that's the tomato sauce. Fin. End"

And yeah.... West Coast people are pizza retarded.... stuff like gluten free unmilled wholegrain crusts with dry roasted okra, artisan mayonnaise, baby pineapple and kiwi berry slices, and diseccated used Pampers from a discarded anchor baby w/a sweet and sour marmalade liberally doused over that 'pie travesty'...

Basically Prog Pizza.

They do that in the trendy areas of Australia too.... and charge 45 bucks per 16 inch pizza.

I order the Prog Supremes and have them remove 6-10 ingredients until it resembles a real pizza because they charge you 2-3 bucks for any ingredient you add (including black pepper) but don't charge you for removals.

I'm like:

"Please take out the sparkler dust, thong footwear, kale, fake meat, fake cheese, any fruit, any barbecue sauce, rhubarb, artichokes, and gender queer studies tampons, thnx"...

Then I add that if I find a single piece of pineapple on my pie, I'm going to take a massive dookie on the it and throw it into their kitchen.....which sometimes backfires if the kid behind the counter turns red, winks, and whispers "yes please".

Olives are fruit and they most definitely belong on pizza!~

[Frood]

Olives are fruit and they most definitely belong on pizza!~

Olives are savoury fruit soaked in brine.

They get a pass.

Black Olives Matter

[caskur]

Olives are savoury fruit soaked in brine.

They get a pass.

Black Olives Matter

Indeed... black olives do matter.

8 people we gave olives to this year said they were THE BEST olives they had ever eaten.

[Adolf Oliver Bush]

Rhubarb on pizza? Jesus fucking christ, now I have heard everything...

[Frood]

Nothing worse than paying big $$$$$ for shitty food :( 

Ever think about opening your own food truck?  Have a limited menu with your own special eats for a reasonable price and park on a busy street at lunchtime..   You'd probably make a killing

A number of people have told me the exact same thing, and I'd love it, if it weren't for the heavy bureaucracy.

[Frood]

So this is a prime example of Australian take out/away/delivery food and food service in general:



Pizzas here are pretty fucking shit and the better ones are still mediocre compared to East Coast or Chicago style US pizzas.

I tried to order another "Monster" "12 inch" pizza again with explicit instructions to not accidentally dump a dozen or so putrid chunks of tinned pineapple on it.

 

Fucking "Monster 12 Inch"! 

Nearly 30 dollars for an almost inedible shit pie (though the best that any shop around here can produce),

Almost 10 bucks more for delivery less than three quarters of a mile away...

But the kicker is that they added 10% GST! Aka Goods and Services Tax... which is ALWAYS incorporated into the asking price... so these motherfuckers are on THE TAKE.

40 bucks AUD (or 30 bucks USD) for a tiny shit pizza delivered down the sidewalk.. 

I went yeah nah... I'll make my own.

And it won't have any trace of that putrefied Seamajor bumhole puke in it.

[Frood]

And the tip option!

 

We don't fucking tip here in Australia because the socialist governments set high minimum wages.

[caskur]

And the tip option!

 

We don't fucking tip here in Australia because the socialist governments set high minimum wages.

that is right, tipping isn't the custom and should never be the custom.

[Frood]

that is right, tipping isn't the custom and should never be the custom.

Did you notice one of the red bars below saying I hadn't spent 30 bucks on my order to qualify for delivery?

I removed pineapple but to add any ingredient would cost me between 2 and 4.5 bucks. No refund for the pineapple either.

This is why service industries in Australia are fucked... not just because of the covid years.

They've been charging for ketchup packets since the beginning of time here...