You must insult the person above you.

[Renegade Quark]

Frequents truck stops as a hooker to feed his crack habit.

[Shen Li]

Doctor: RQ, you tested postive for AIDS
RQ: OHMIGAWD, what do I do?
Doctor: Eats lots of Mexican food
RQ: Will that cure the AIDS?
Doctor: No, but it'll teach you what your asshole is for

[Renegade Quark]

Thinks she's hot shit in a champagne glass when she is nothing but cold diarrhea in a Dixie Cup.

[Shen Li]

RQ: When you stick it in my mouth do you want me to look in your eyes?
Cop: Sir, just blow in the breathalyzer please.

[Renegade Quark]

She tried to do heroin once, but she couldn't get the spoon through her skin.

[Prof Emeritus at Fawk U]

His proctologist is the only person he can see eye to eye with.

[Shen Li]

Prof read a book that said treat your wife like you did on the first date.

So after supper last night he dropped her off at her parents house.

[Renegade Quark]

Wishes she could read a book.

[Shen Li]

When he dies he wants to be cremated. That way he'll have a smoking hot body at least once.

[Renegade Quark]

She's not stupid, she just has bad luck when thinking.

[Shen Li]

He tries to avoid things that make him fat. Like scales, pictures and mirrors.

[J E B Stuart]

Thinks nobody knows that her favorite pastime is binge watching ABBA music videos while locked in her bedroom.

Amen. 

[Shen Li]

Stu says the hardest thing about eating any vegetable is putting her back in her wheel chair.

[Prof Emeritus at Fawk U]

Mixes rum, ecstasy, and baby oil which she calls 'Diddy's special sauce'.

[Shen Li]

Prof saw a Black man running down the street with a TV and he thought "that's mine."

Then he realized his is at home, polishing his shoes.