You must insult the person above you.

[Renegade Quark]

Her name is Chinese for swamp donkey.

[J E B Stuart]

Everybody calls him "Melancholy" 'cause he has a head like a melon and a nose like a Collie.

Amen.

[Prof Emeritus at Fawk U]

Mixes vodka, gin, and WD40 and calls it 'Rusty Nail Polish'. 

[Shen Li]

Prof is so dumb he thinks a quarterback is a refund.

[Renegade Quark]

Loves Canada.

[J E B Stuart]

Loves quiche.

Amen.

[Prof Emeritus at Fawk U]

Goes to boutiques for hook ups.

[J E B Stuart]

Was Ned Beatty's stunt double in Deliverance.

Amen.

[Shen Li]

Stu calling 911 - "I think my wife is dead!"
911 Dispatcher - "How can you tell?"
Stu - "Well, the sex is still the same but the dishes are piling up."

[J E B Stuart]

Next time Shen Li threatens to sit on my face, I'll be ready.



Amen.

[Shen Li]

6 months ago Stu read that a cucumber a day could cleanse his colon.

Today he found out he was supposed to eat them.

[Renegade Quark]

Drives like an Asian woman.

[Prof Emeritus at Fawk U]

Drives like the person stuck behind the Asian woman.

[Shen Li]

Prof's wife blamed him for ruining her birthday.

Prof said "that's ridiculous. I didn't even know it was ur birthday."