Really getting sick of this

[Anonymous]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

[Anonymous]

I found out something awful today. My ex boyfriend, high school boyfriend, we were together for almost 5 years and engaged before I broke up with him, his youngest brother died Friday from a heroin overdose at the age of 31.   I was close with and attached to this family. I haven't seen or spoke with any of them in about a decade.  We all have mutual friends and such, so I was informed of this today.  The family was hit hard by the economy, the mothers job was outsourced and the father's business hasn't been doing well....so they lost their house back in 2010 and have no money to bury their son.  My husband and I plan to donate. I really hate this demon that is addiction....I've seen so many people die the past few years. Young people. Intelligent, bright, creative and beatiful people. I'm sick of this, this world that destroys souls and hearts.  Is it just me, or does it seem like there is more pain and brokenness in the world than there was 10 years ago?

This part is what struck me.  That would be miserable.  The people in the family who are contributing financially are coming up against a changed economy.  The mother's job was outsourced.  The father's business is struggling.  Very tough situation.  If anything changed in 10 years ... I don't live in the states so my opinion on whether the economy has changed for them is from the outside - looks like it.

It's heart breaking. My husband and I plan to donate.  This family has always struggled.

[Aryan]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

[Bricktop]

So, in fact, its not the drug that is the problem. Its society, and the breakdown of the family unit. Its because people breed, but don't want to be parents.



But you're background is very similar to mine. I did not succumb to drugs or alcohol. What makes us different then?

Yes to the first part, in its simplest form.  Second part....we probably aren't very different.  Your heroin is probably the internet. Before that.. perhaps work. Maybe porn. Porn is a big one.  Perhaps gambling or gaming.  If the Internet(or your chosen poison) was gone, you'd simply find the next thing.  You probably think that's just what people do....everyone has a "vice" in your thinking, right? I see people in NA, addicted to recovery,  addicted to approval,  Addicted to fitness,  Addicted to food.  It's like an iceburg, the actual using behavior is only the 30 percent sticking out of the water....and that 70 percent is still down there safely out of sight.

My dear, when I was an "addict", there were no such things as personal computers. In fact drug use and availability was somewhat patchy in those days.



I don't deny an addiction. However, I clearly understood that some addictions were life changers, so I confined myself to those that were private and not physically harmful.



So why did you choose something you new was a ticket to tragedy?

[Anonymous]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

[Anonymous]

So, in fact, its not the drug that is the problem. Its society, and the breakdown of the family unit. Its because people breed, but don't want to be parents.



But you're background is very similar to mine. I did not succumb to drugs or alcohol. What makes us different then?

Yes to the first part, in its simplest form.  Second part....we probably aren't very different.  Your heroin is probably the internet. Before that.. perhaps work. Maybe porn. Porn is a big one.  Perhaps gambling or gaming.  If the Internet(or your chosen poison) was gone, you'd simply find the next thing.  You probably think that's just what people do....everyone has a "vice" in your thinking, right? I see people in NA, addicted to recovery,  addicted to approval,  Addicted to fitness,  Addicted to food.  It's like an iceburg, the actual using behavior is only the 30 percent sticking out of the water....and that 70 percent is still down there safely out of sight.

My dear, when I was an "addict", there were no such things as personal computers. In fact drug use and availability was somewhat patchy in those days.



I don't deny an addiction. However, I clearly understood that some addictions were life changers, so I confined myself to those that were private and not physically harmful.



So why did you choose something you new was a ticket to tragedy?

 Did you read what I said?  Your response is bizarre and almost proving my point.

[Bricktop]

Perhaps.



But what I am alluding to is what factor compels some to engage in self destruction knowlingly and willingly.



Don't get me wrong. I have never believed that drug abuse should be treated as a crime, but as a health issue. But what is the factor that leads to a slow death?

[Aryan]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

I probably do drink too much but I can go without it and not become ill or have any withdrawal symptoms, I use it to unwind in an evening.  My main reason for drinking a lot was in social situations were it makes me more chatty, as I  can be quiet around people who I dont know.

[Renee]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

I probably do drink too much but I can go without it and not become ill or have any withdrawal symptoms, I use it to unwind in an evening.  My main reason for drinking a lot was in social situations were it makes me more chatty, as I  can be quiet around people who I dont know.

Oh boy, look at this shit; we have an introverted, neo-Nazi, skinhead in our midst. Isn't that great. I don't see a problem here.



So Heinrich, how long is your list of people that you want to annihilate? Let me guess, the God damn Jewoooos are at the top of the list, followed by blacks, Muslims and other assorted non-Aryan types.  Or do you think outside the standard block headed box and have more nontraditional ideas of who the inferiors are?

[Anonymous]

Perhaps.



But what I am alluding to is what factor compels some to engage in self destruction knowlingly and willingly.



Don't get me wrong. I have never believed that drug abuse should be treated as a crime, but as a health issue. But what is the factor that leads to a slow death?

Addiction is a disorder.  That's what I'm trying to explain.  Obsessive use of something. There is also a difference between active addiction and recovery. Like cancer and remission.  You are never NOT an addict.  Who chose heroin, you wonder?  For me....I had just gone through a bunch of surgical procedures on my kidney.  Right around that time my best friend died of a heart attack. So I started eating my pain pills like candy....between that and the iv dilauded, I felt like I had arrived.  It didn't take long before my pill habit wasn't enough and I went for the heroin. I was already dependant and had been.  I was already a problem drinker, so if anything adding heroin to the mix forced me to admit I had serious issues with addiction and I was going to die if I didn't take drastic action.  You don't really think about this until you have to....until then you operate under layers of denial and justifications.  That's the scary part, spec.  When the essence of your madness is a need to control every little in your world but you yourself are the out of control factor.  I used to have depressions so intense that I would lay on the bottom of the shower wondering what the point of getting up was.  It looks a lot like bipolar....because everything is in extremes. I started off a love addict really. I'm 35 right now, and I have 2 divorces and 3 children from 3 different father's under my belt.  And I'M the one every one comes to for advice!  That always amused me.  I have friends who were far more stable than I ever was....seeking me for advice. Even when I was on heroin. I would think "oh sure, just lemme take the needle out of my arm and slap some peroxide on this absess and I'll tell you what you should do with your life" lol.  90 percent of my relationships were codependant.   To this day relationally I have to stay balanced. My mom decided to detox from her benzos, stop drinking and she's now at the mission here in my community, doing the program I did. I have to stay away, or I'll be in there trying to take care of her and call shots.

[Anonymous]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

I probably do drink too much but I can go without it and not become ill or have any withdrawal symptoms, I use it to unwind in an evening.  My main reason for drinking a lot was in social situations were it makes me more chatty, as I  can be quiet around people who I dont know.

 Until that day you dont. I'm just saying.....I know people who drank and said the same thing you are saying. Alcohol can take a sudden and extreme turn. I'm not telling you to put it down now and go to rehab....I'm just telling you what I've witnessed more times than I ever wanted to. I went years doing exactly what you described as well. I'm only saying you are more vulnerable than you realize when you use something "to relax".   Or to be more chatty. It's a means to accomplish something in yourself you feel you can't do without chemical help. That makes you vunerable. Just be careful. Look at the areas where you think the alcohol is helping you.

[Aryan]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

I probably do drink too much but I can go without it and not become ill or have any withdrawal symptoms, I use it to unwind in an evening.  My main reason for drinking a lot was in social situations were it makes me more chatty, as I  can be quiet around people who I dont know.

Oh boy, look at this shit; we have an introverted, neo-Nazi, skinhead in our midst. Isn't that great. I don't see a problem here.



So Heinrich, how long is your list of people that you want to annihilate? Let me guess, the God damn Jewoooos are at the top of the list, followed by blacks, Muslims and other assorted non-Aryan types.  Or do you think outside the standard block headed box and have more nontraditional ideas of who the inferiors are?

Actually its overweight gobby women who irritate me the most.....

[Aryan]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

I probably do drink too much but I can go without it and not become ill or have any withdrawal symptoms, I use it to unwind in an evening.  My main reason for drinking a lot was in social situations were it makes me more chatty, as I  can be quiet around people who I dont know.

 Until that day you dont. I'm just saying.....I know people who drank and said the same thing you are saying. Alcohol can take a sudden and extreme turn. I'm not telling you to put it down now and go to rehab....I'm just telling you what I've witnessed more times than I ever wanted to. I went years doing exactly what you described as well. I'm only saying you are more vulnerable than you realize when you use something "to relax".   Or to be more chatty. It's a means to accomplish something in yourself you feel you can't do without chemical help. That makes you vunerable. Just be careful. Look at the areas where you think the alcohol is helping you.

I hear ya, but alcohol has become a way of life for me and I doubt I'll ever stop drinking, I enjoy it too much lol.

[Anonymous]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

I probably do drink too much but I can go without it and not become ill or have any withdrawal symptoms, I use it to unwind in an evening.  My main reason for drinking a lot was in social situations were it makes me more chatty, as I  can be quiet around people who I dont know.

 Until that day you dont. I'm just saying.....I know people who drank and said the same thing you are saying. Alcohol can take a sudden and extreme turn. I'm not telling you to put it down now and go to rehab....I'm just telling you what I've witnessed more times than I ever wanted to. I went years doing exactly what you described as well. I'm only saying you are more vulnerable than you realize when you use something "to relax".   Or to be more chatty. It's a means to accomplish something in yourself you feel you can't do without chemical help. That makes you vunerable. Just be careful. Look at the areas where you think the alcohol is helping you.

I hear ya, but alcohol has become a way of life for me and I doubt I'll ever stop drinking, I enjoy it too much lol.

I hope it never becomes too much of a problem for you SCOUSE.

[Anonymous]

Heroin addiction is a particularly nasty affliction, and overdose is an all too common thing....



Its a drug which I would never ever try.

 Don't do it. You'll love it and you won't stop. Before you know it you are hollow shadow of your former self completely dominated by the drug.  I used to get in the bathtub and eat Xanax when I was dope sick and waiting.....just wishing I could have ONE day where I'm not obsessed with it.  I wanted to die, if only to end the slavery of it. I overdosed as well and was angery i didnt die. And the stats on recovery aren't very promising. More people die than recover.  It's a real life horror story. God delivered me from that....but I'm not so foolish to ever let my guard down with substances again. I don't even drink anymore. The worst part is when you go through all that....get clean, work hard....and moments pop up where you miss it. Like stokholm syndrom. This young man who died...he was only 31. He got started in the party crowd at 13.  He has never lived a truly sober life.

Yeah, if a state of mind or drug is too nice its gonna become an obsession.



Alcohol and cocaine are my choices for recreational use, but the harder stuff I stay well clear from.

 Well heroin has some wicked chemical hooks. You get physically dependant pretty fast.  Your tolerance also sky rockets and quickly you find you are no longer using for the high.....but rather using to not be sick. You need it to feel normal. And you are whacked out of your mind but you don't really realize it. It's just like Axl sang in Mr. Brownstone. "I used to do a little but a little wouldn't do so the little got more and more. I just keep trying to get a little better, a little better than before".   Alcohol can turn on you too.  Once you are dependant on alcohol you are in for a world of hurt.  I know ALOT of alcoholics who were recovering heroin addicts.  I think once youve gone into full blown active addiction, you've gone somewhere you will never come back from. It changes your perspective, the way you see yourself and others and alters your physiology. Be careful with drinking.  And cocaine?  That's so 1990s...lol.

I probably do drink too much but I can go without it and not become ill or have any withdrawal symptoms, I use it to unwind in an evening.  My main reason for drinking a lot was in social situations were it makes me more chatty, as I  can be quiet around people who I dont know.

 Until that day you dont. I'm just saying.....I know people who drank and said the same thing you are saying. Alcohol can take a sudden and extreme turn. I'm not telling you to put it down now and go to rehab....I'm just telling you what I've witnessed more times than I ever wanted to. I went years doing exactly what you described as well. I'm only saying you are more vulnerable than you realize when you use something "to relax".   Or to be more chatty. It's a means to accomplish something in yourself you feel you can't do without chemical help. That makes you vunerable. Just be careful. Look at the areas where you think the alcohol is helping you.

I hear ya, but alcohol has become a way of life for me and I doubt I'll ever stop drinking, I enjoy it too much lol.

 There ya go.  The thing with substances, we only abuse them for a short period before they begin abusing us. And they are better at it..  lol.