Both our adult kids moved out today. Son has an apartment with his girlfriend of 3 years and daughter is moving in with her girlfriend until her boyfriend and her get a place. I'm happy for our son, he's ready but our daughter is so not ready or prepared. But I said ok fine go ahead and so she came by today and packed up a bunch of shit and left, each week she'll be back to get more. Her and I are not on speaking terms now, we had a disagreement about the stupidest shit, mainly brought on by her boyfriend. Hubby and I don't like him at all. Hubby wants to pinch his head off ac_toofunny
Quote from: "Annie"
I don't know if I should congratulate you or hand you a box of tissue. Even if it doesn't work out for your daughter, hopefully she'll learn something from the experience.
Oh she'll be back, this is the second time she's suddenly moved out lol She just needs to have a taste of reality and it will sink in.....
Quote from: "Annie"
How long was she gone the first time?
Like 2 weeks lol
Quote from: "Annie"
In other words, a glorified sleepover. Maybe it will last longer this time. Maybe, she'll mature from the experience too.
She has matured a little here and there but she is mentality challenged , although she's high functioning and can fake it pretty well until things fall apart. The first time was last year and she went to live with her friend, I knew she'd be ok because the friend is a good friend we've know for a long time. This time she's moving in with her again and then getting a place with her controlling never shut up know it all annoying boyfriend. This next while be very interesting.
Quote from: "Annie"
Lemme ask you this, do you see her ever being able to live on her own permanently? If so, roughly at what age do you foresee that happening?
I have no idea really, at the moment she's waiting for a liver transplant, she's mentally challenged and a bit gullable, she's fairly easily influenced. I still have full control of her finances and her medical decisions. She has a lot of memory problems and poor money management as well as cleaning and cooking. She needs someone to care for her really right now. She's 20 next month and wants to be "grown up" and I get it. For the longest time I've been trying to teach her the life skills she needs as an adult and she's been good so far with taking her bunch of supplements a day she needs, although I remind her a couple times a week. She's really good with where she's travelling to and knows her busses and stops. She's strong in some areas but other areas still needs help. Her transplant can happen anytime this year or next even, depending on how long we can make her existing liver last. After that she will need 3 months of 24 hour care, I'm worried if she's not home for that, none of her friends are prepared for that.
Quote from: "Annie"
Oh fuck, I forgot she needs a liver transplant. That certainly adds a different dynamic to the whole maturing thing. Her circumstances are so different, it's hard to say what is best for her.
Exactly, I'm in so many places right now ac_crying
Quote from: "Annie"
I don't want to think about my children growing up and leaving me Annie..
I cried my eyes out when my daughter started her junior high school years..
I know I will face this some day, but I don't know how I will cope with it.
ac_unsure
Quote from: "Fashionista"
Quote from: "Annie"
I don't want to think about my children growing up and leaving me Annie..
I cried my eyes out when my daughter started her junior high school years..
I know I will face this some day, but I don't know how I will cope with it.
ac_unsure
It's none of my business, but you got to be careful with the coddling, especially with your son. You want him to become a successful, masculine, type A REAL man don't you? Personally, I would rather my son have cancer than become some pathetic, effeminate, socialist, unskilled, useless homo idiot like the white "men" that remain in VF. Poor parenting allowed that injustice to society to happen. You got to push kids hard if you want results.
I am the tiger mommy, hear me ROAR!!.
Annie, I guess the best you can do is stay in close contact with your daughter without making it appear too intrusive. That's going to be a tough trick. I hope it all works out for you and her.
I found out what it's like when a child moves out this past year. My oldest went off to college and we only see her on holidays and breaks. I didn't think it was going to bother me too much until she was gone. It was traumatic for me beyond anything I expected. She's been out since late last August and I'm still not used to the idea.
Quote from: "Renee"
I found out what it's like when a child moves out this past year. My oldest went off to college and we only see her on holidays and breaks. I didn't think it was going to bother me too much until she was gone.
So, I've heard. I lived at home when I was in uni. I'd say it's tough when they study out of town.
Quote from: "Shen Li"
Quote from: "Renee"
I found out what it's like when a child moves out this past year. My oldest went off to college and we only see her on holidays and breaks. I didn't think it was going to bother me too much until she was gone.
So, I've heard. I lived at home when I was in uni. I'd say it's tough when they study out of town.
I know it's harder when you don't dorm. I wanted her to stay at school and get the full college experience like I did. but it's hard to let go. I've never been one of those clingy moms but this was really difficult and my reaction has really surprised and unsettled me. I think it's been so hard because she is my first born and we are very close. Hopefully it will get easier because I got 2 more that will be going in the near future as well.
Kids moving out, great have a party ac_dance change a room to a workout room, or rent it out . ac_dance
It would be funny to rent it out to one of their friends, talking awkward when your kids come over.
lol Bue, that's something I would probably do but I'm holding out thinking she might want to come back when she realizes she isn't prepared to be on her own.
Quote from: "Renee"
Quote from: "Shen Li"
Quote from: "Renee"
I found out what it's like when a child moves out this past year. My oldest went off to college and we only see her on holidays and breaks. I didn't think it was going to bother me too much until she was gone.
So, I've heard. I lived at home when I was in uni. I'd say it's tough when the study out of town.
I know it's harder when you don't dorm. I wanted her to stay at school and get the full college experience like I did. but it's hard to let go. I've never been one of those clingy moms but this was really difficult and my reaction has really surprised and unsettled me. I think it's been so hard because she is my first born and we are very close. Hopefully it will get easier because I got 2 more that will be going in the near future as well.
The most important thing Renee is that your daughter is in university..
You should be proud of her and yourself.
Quote from: "Renee"
I know it's harder when you don't dorm. I wanted her to stay at school and get the full college experience like I did. but it's hard to let go. I've never been one of those clingy moms but this was really difficult and my reaction has really surprised and unsettled me. I think it's been so hard because she is my first born and we are very close. Hopefully it will get easier because I got 2 more that will be going in the near future as well.
I don't know about that Renee. I am petroleum engineer, so obviously I studied with guys. I heard stories of guys getting in fights with roommates , money problems and friends becoming enemies. Those of us that lived away did not experience these hostilities. Besides, being a chick they all wanted to get into my pants. ac_razz ac_cool
My daughter and her friend just spent several hours hanging out and chatting, we're all good now yay! She's still getting a place with her bf next month and still staying at her friend's but she asked if she could come over for a sleepover once in awhile....she misses us!
Quote from: "Annie"
What about after she has her transplant? If her bf is working and in school who will provide her with the round the clock care she will require? She'll have to stay with you during her recovery.
We're gonna play it by ear, so far hubby son and son's friends all say she will be back it wont last long. But he is feeding her well and she's always taking the 6 or so supplements she needs a day so who knows maybe she won't need it anytime soon. Like hubby would say, don't worry about something that hasn't happened yet. When it does I know I'll be her 24 hr caregiver. Whenever she's in the hospital she doesn't like nurses attending to her she always insists it's me, even when I have to wipe her butt after a surgery lol
Quote from: "Shen Li"
Quote from: "Renee"
I know it's harder when you don't dorm. I wanted her to stay at school and get the full college experience like I did. but it's hard to let go. I've never been one of those clingy moms but this was really difficult and my reaction has really surprised and unsettled me. I think it's been so hard because she is my first born and we are very close. Hopefully it will get easier because I got 2 more that will be going in the near future as well.
I don't know about that Renee. I am petroleum engineer, so obviously I studied with guys. I heard stories of guys getting in fights with roommates , money problems and friends becoming enemies. Those of us that lived away did not experience these hostilities.
I can see how that would suck especially you probably attended a tech university. The guys were probably a bunch of pencil necked, pimply, calculus, geeks. ac_lmfao
Besides my daughter won't have that problem. I trainer her to be a lesbian for the next four years. ac_lmfao
Quote from: "Renee"
Quote from: "Shen Li"
Quote from: "Renee"
I know it's harder when you don't dorm. I wanted her to stay at school and get the full college experience like I did. but it's hard to let go. I've never been one of those clingy moms but this was really difficult and my reaction has really surprised and unsettled me. I think it's been so hard because she is my first born and we are very close. Hopefully it will get easier because I got 2 more that will be going in the near future as well.
I don't know about that Renee. I am petroleum engineer, so obviously I studied with guys. I heard stories of guys getting in fights with roommates , money problems and friends becoming enemies. Those of us that lived away did not experience these hostilities.
I can see how that would suck especially you probably attended a tech university. The guys were probably a bunch of pencil necked, pimply, calculus, geeks. ac_lmfao
Besides my daughter won't have that problem. I trainer her to be a lesbian for the next four years. ac_lmfao
I think that stereotype of engineering students is a tired cliché. For the most part, they were easier on the eyes than the androgynous, skinny jeans wearing, liberal arts fairies.
There were some hawt guys when I was in uni. I wasn't popular in high school, so getting all that attention was nice for a change, but it quickly turned to being an annoyance.
Quote from: "Shen Li"
Quote from: "Renee"
Quote from: "Shen Li"
I don't know about that Renee. I am petroleum engineer, so obviously I studied with guys. I heard stories of guys getting in fights with roommates , money problems and friends becoming enemies. Those of us that lived away did not experience these hostilities.
I can see how that would suck especially you probably attended a tech university. The guys were probably a bunch of pencil necked, pimply, calculus, geeks. ac_lmfao
Besides my daughter won't have that problem. I trainer her to be a lesbian for the next four years. ac_lmfao
There were some hawt guys when I was in uni. I wasn't popular in high school, so getting all that attention was nice for a change, but it quickly turned to being an annoyance.
Yeah okay maybe in your school. When I went to college most of the engineering students were ex-D&D players or their last name was fucking Patel. ac_toofunny
The hottest guys were always the guys in the drama program. Unfortunately 80% of them were usually gay. ac_umm
I never had the opportunity to go to university, but I will make sure my children do.
Well...that didn't last long lol she and I had a good talk and she realizes she really wasn't prepared to move out. We also talked about her health and being here is the safest place. Now we have to go to her friend's place and lug everything back oh joy!
Quote from: "Annie"
well you got three pages out of it anyway
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
Quote from: "Annie"
well you got three pages out of it anyway
It's too bad Obvious Li that Annie has to move everything back home so quickly.
Quote from: "Annie"
The joys of being a parent. ac_toofunny
Quote from: "Renee"
Quote from: "Annie"
The joys of being a parent. ac_toofunny
yes and it continues forever.......seems like anyway.....my mother treats me the same as she did when i was eight.....probably because i still act like it sometimes.....oh well pass it froward
Quote from: "Annie"
Maybe a game room ac_dance they could come visit, and wish they could come back.
I know, hard to let go, but it has to happen sometime for them to really grow.
We can only hope they do well, and become happy out there.
Good luck to them, and you, may your heart not be broken. ac_flower
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
Quote from: "Annie"
well you got three pages out of it anyway
Hey, ya! That I did! ac_dance
Quote from: "Blue"
Quote from: "Annie"
Maybe a game room ac_dance they could come visit, and wish they could come back.
I know, hard to let go, but it has to happen sometime for them to really grow.
We can only hope they do well, and become happy out there.
Good luck to them, and you, may your heart not be broken. ac_flower
Thanks Blue, with any family with kids, the heart strings are always being pulled on, we are constantly being tested.
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
Quote from: "Renee"
Quote from: "Annie"
The joys of being a parent. ac_toofunny
yes and it continues forever.......seems like anyway.....my mother treats me the same as she did when i was eight.....probably because i still act like it sometimes.....oh well pass it froward
It is a little different with my Mommy.....we are best friends.
If i can Annie, When my dad kicked me out of the house it was the best thing he could have done. It taught me how hard it was to live my own, But i got a good job a nice house and now im fuckin rich and single. rofl
Quote from: "Keeper"
ac_lovestruck ac_lovestruck ac_lovestruck
I was out on my own at 16, working and going to school. I learned very quickly how to take care of myself, although most of time till I was 18 I hardly ate and I weighed like 90 lbs lol
Quote from: "Annie"
I lived with my parents for one year after I graduated from uni. I don't regret it though. I never rented, I went straight to home ownership. I was stable and able to stand on my own two feet.
After my dad kicked me out i lived in my 1974 Datsun B-210 hatchback (google that bitch) for 2 weeks, got a job sweeping floors in the welding shop i apprenticed for school the year before then ROAD trip to Whitecourt Alberta to shingle houses. The rest of that story you need to get me drunk for me to tell you. ac_dance
Quote from: "Keeper"
I won't do that Keeper, but I would still like to read it.
ac_smile
Quote from: "Keeper"
Honey Bee version? ac_biggrin
One of my early memories is that our neighbor across the street had a B210 hatchback. It was yellow with black louvers on the rear window and black strips on the sides. ac_dance
I remember being around 4 years old and thinking that when I grow up, I want to drive a cool car like that. ac_biggrin
left home at 14......went back occasionally to visit......that was it
What does Obvious Li and an Appalachian bride have in common?.......They both left home at 14. ac_toofunny
I just made that up. ac_biggrin
Quote from: "Renee"
I just made that up. ac_biggrin
As long as OL didn't knock her up.
Quote from: "Renee"
I just made that up. ac_biggrin
Renee wants her kids to move out so she can eat their desserts, isn't that true whale? ac_drinks ac_cool ac_drinks
Quote from: "Gary Oak"
Quote from: "Renee"
I just made that up. ac_biggrin
Renee wants her kids to move out so she can eat their desserts, isn't that true whale? ac_drinks ac_cool ac_drinks
[/b]
not often you capture both of our most learnered posters in the same post.....great screen shot...yucka yucka yuck
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
Quote from: "Gary Oak"
Quote from: "Renee"
I just made that up. ac_biggrin
Renee wants her kids to move out so she can eat their desserts, isn't that true whale? ac_drinks ac_cool ac_drinks
[/b]
not often you capture both of our most learnered posters in the same post.....great screen shot...yucka yucka yuck
Both of you are intelligent Obvious Li.
ac_smile
Quote from: "Fashionista"
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
Quote from: "Gary Oak"
Renee wants her kids to move out so she can eat their desserts, isn't that true whale? ac_drinks ac_cool ac_drinks
[/b]
not often you capture both of our most learnered posters in the same post.....great screen shot...yucka yucka yuck
Both of you are intelligent Obvious Li.
ac_smile
uh Fash darling...i was referring to two of our more brilliant posters ...renee and oak.....never mind my english is bad
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
Quote from: "Fashionista"
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
not often you capture both of our most learnered posters in the same post.....great screen shot...yucka yucka yuck
Both of you are intelligent Obvious Li.
ac_smile
uh Fash darling...i was referring to two of our more brilliant posters ...renee and oak.....never mind my english is bad
Gary Oak is unique, but I am not sure if I would use the word brilliant to describe him.
ac_umm
Quote from: "Gary Oak"
Actually I don't want them to move out. I want to keep them like slaves so they can just bring me food as I sit around the house like Jabba the Hut. ac_rollseyes ac_toofunny
If your taste in literature wasn't bad enough; you're also a halfwit. ac_biggrin
Quote from: "Fashionista"
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
Quote from: "Fashionista"
Both of you are intelligent Obvious Li.
ac_smile
uh Fash darling...i was referring to two of our more brilliant posters ...renee and oak.....never mind my english is bad
Gary Oak is unique, but I am not sure if I would use the word brilliant to describe him.
ac_umm
Using the word "brilliant" to describe Mr. Oak is like calling a snail "speedy". A total contradiction in terms.
Quote from: "Renee"
Quote from: "Fashionista"
Quote from: "Obvious Li"
uh Fash darling...i was referring to two of our more brilliant posters ...renee and oak.....never mind my english is bad
Gary Oak is unique, but I am not sure if I would use the word brilliant to describe him.
ac_umm
Using the word "brilliant" to describe Mr. Oak is like calling a snail "speedy". A total contradiction in terms.
ac_toofunny