Laughter Lounge

[@realAzhyaAryola]

DIFFERENT WAYS OF LOOKING AT THINGS:



Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and Family values.

 

Bill said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?'

 

Larry replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?'

___________________________________________

 

A little boy went up to his father and asked: 'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?'

 

The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine.'

___________________________________________

 

'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the

divorce Court Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife

$775 a week,'

 

'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every

now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.'

___________________________________________





A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency

Room, took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of

your wife at all..'

 

'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and

really good with the kids.'

___________________________________________





An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a

curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.

 

The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact

words that were used to put the curse on you.'

 

The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you

man and wife.'

___________________________________________





Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder:

1. The DNA all matches.

2. There are no dental records.

___________________________________________

 

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how

long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City ?'

The agent replies, 'Just a minute.'

'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.

___________________________________________

 

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of

Juan Gonzalez.

'How was he killed?' asked one detective.

'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied.

'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?'

'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.'

___________________________________________





Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.'

Joe: 'Really?'

Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.'

___________________________________________

 

A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears

and asks him how he is feeling.

 

'I'm O. K. But I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used

in surgery,' he answered.

 

'What did he say,' asked the nurse.

 

'Oops!'

___________________________________________

 

While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a

display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty

pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I

sought my husband's advice.

 

'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?'

 

'Better get a bikini,' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one.'

 



___________________________________________

 

The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive

clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning,

accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.

 

The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well,

she's there.'



 ac_toofunny  ac_lmfao

[RW]

I had to do it for Renee...



https://scontent-sea.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/v/t1.0-9/10999808_634966393270965_3852978281069487960_n.jpg?oh=f888df47db948016f88eb0e980e36549&oe=55E5D3A1">

[Anonymous]

I had to do it for Renee...



https://scontent-sea.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xfp1/v/t1.0-9/10999808_634966393270965_3852978281069487960_n.jpg?oh=f888df47db948016f88eb0e980e36549&oe=55E5D3A1">

 ac_toofunny  ac_lmfao

[Leopardsocks]

ac_toofunny  ac_lmfao



Good one, Azhya!!!

[Anonymous]

DIFFERENT WAYS OF LOOKING AT THINGS:



Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and Family values.

 

Bill said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?'

 

Larry replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?'

___________________________________________

 

A little boy went up to his father and asked: 'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?'

 

The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine.'

___________________________________________

 

'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the

divorce Court Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife

$775 a week,'

 

'That's very fair, your honor,' the husband said. 'And every

now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself.'

___________________________________________





A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency

Room, took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of

your wife at all..'

 

'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and

really good with the kids.'

___________________________________________





An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a

curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.

 

The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact

words that were used to put the curse on you.'

 

The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you

man and wife.'

___________________________________________





Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder:

1. The DNA all matches.

2. There are no dental records.

___________________________________________

 

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how

long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City ?'

The agent replies, 'Just a minute.'

'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up.

___________________________________________

 

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of

Juan Gonzalez.

'How was he killed?' asked one detective.

'With a golf gun,' the other detective replied.

'A golf gun! What is a golf gun?'

'I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.'

___________________________________________





Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.'

Joe: 'Really?'

Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.'

___________________________________________

 

A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears

and asks him how he is feeling.

 

'I'm O. K. But I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used

in surgery,' he answered.

 

'What did he say,' asked the nurse.

 

'Oops!'

___________________________________________

 

While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a

display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty

pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I

sought my husband's advice.

 

'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?'

 

'Better get a bikini,' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one.'

 



___________________________________________

 

The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive

clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning,

accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.

 

The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well,

she's there.'



 ac_toofunny  ac_lmfao

All very funny Azhya.

 ac_toofunny

[RW]

https://scontent-sea.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/10398683_919433688077426_6152919995556013829_n.jpg?oh=5f16aed03fa20001bcc333cc30189018&oe=55E42C45">

[RW]

haha Game of Thrones pick up lines!



http://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/aYWRe9O_700b.jpg">

[Bit]

Rob can go down on me any day.

[Anonymous]

haha Game of Thrones pick up lines!



http://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/aYWRe9O_700b.jpg">

Maybe I should watch that show RW.

 ac_umm

[Annie]

Oh Oberyn, when he was killed I cried  ac_crying

[RW]

He was my favourite.

[Anonymous]

https://scontent-sea.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/10398683_919433688077426_6152919995556013829_n.jpg?oh=5f16aed03fa20001bcc333cc30189018&oe=55E42C45">

We have a winner. ac_lmfao

[@realAzhyaAryola]

ac_lmfao  ac_toofunny

[easter bunny]

http://www.thepoke.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/VaNgQUx-1024x576.jpg">

[@realAzhyaAryola]

ac_toofunny  ac_lmfao