ATTN: Lonely Men...

[Mel Gibson]

...having trouble attracting a female companion?  I shall give you simple advice on how to deal with this problem...



Now, there are only two things required to attract the female species.  Remember, the female is a primitive beast, and as such is essentially driven by primitive urges.



First off, you need to be Alpha-as-fuck.  Woman want a real man, not a little girl to babysit.  They liked to be slapped around a little bit.  They like to be dominated.  So, if you're a little sissy beta-boy, time to become a hairy macho man!  Treat them as they desire to be treated!  With a heavy, dominating hand!



Secondly, they desire at least eight inches of rock hard cock.  If you have a floppy two-inch noodle, you're SOL.  This problem is more difficult to fix, but I do believe they make slip-on penises you slide over your limp noodle.  In the sack, she may not even know the difference.  There are other options, like implant surgery, but these can be a more costly fix.



Coles notes?  Be alpha-as-fuck, like Captain Picard.  Don't be a sissy, faggy boy.  Also, if you don't have a rock hard shaft for her pleasure, get one.



This is it, really.  Women are just that simple!

[Hobart]

You clearly know sweet fuck all about women.



Fuck off idiot.

[Mel Gibson]

Why do I get the feeling that Hobart is RW's alter-ego...

[Hobart]

Because you're a total idiot.

[Mel Gibson]

No...  I'm usually pretty good at this game.

[Hobart]

You are fail at everything.

[Mel Gibson]

Awww!



Why so cranky?  Diapers need changing?