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Re: Forum gossip thread by DKG

The benefits and drawbacks of getting married

Started by shin, October 10, 2017, 09:19:43 AM

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shin

If you are married, how would you say it has changed your life?



What are some of the pluses and minuses you think are associated with being married versus staying single for the duration?



What do you think about people who say they don't ever want to get married?

Anonymous

Quote from: "shin"If you are married, how would you say it has changed your life?



What are some of the pluses and minuses you think are associated with being married versus staying single for the duration?



What do you think about people who say they don't ever want to get married?

I can't think of any significant drawbacks shin..



I got married when I was twenty two after a relatively short courtship..



Being single and not having my own family has no appeal for me.

Odinson

Getting married is not beneficial for a man anymore..

Berry Sweet

Ive never been married and I've never had any desire to get married.  This has lost me many relationships as guys seem really needy and want to get married.



Marriage today has a 50% chance of survival rate.  Wedding are ridiculously expencive for a one day event.  And divorce is not affordable either.  



People today seem to judge their success in life thru marriage, children, homes and other materilastic items.  But underneath it all is debt and stress.

cc

Maybe about half "survive". A lot fewer than that are positive. Many stay together over time because it's there and tolerable in the overall



But, there are some that work extremely well even after time



We didn't believe in big deal weddings, in fact I'd be very suspect of anyone who did. We had family and a few friends over to our place, made it legal, some special food items and partied at home - total cost peanuts. Enjoyed by all.


 
Quote from: "shin"If you are married, how would you say it has changed your life?



What are some of the pluses and minuses you think are associated with being married versus staying single for the duration?

Well shin, there is no "one answer fits all" for several reasons:



First it's not for everyone. Both have to want it for starters



For those who:



- feel that a life with "the right" person can be a better life



- want a "constructive" partner in life



- find true mutual caring with the person they marry and know enough about themselves and the other person to assess a good chance it will remain that way  (or grow even further over time)



- the right mutual dispositions that enhance the other's life



- similar life expectations and objectives



 - similar interests so far as marriage and family etc.



it is can be a winner. Good mixes can increase in caring and genuine love as time goes on



The above do not  all that often come together, so be certain that "both parties" (not just yourself) are choosing well



To put it all in perspective, it was not a first for either of us - so we both chose poorly / naively previously and paid the price of a very bad (unworkable) mix
I really tried to warn y\'all in 49  .. G. Orwell

Anonymous


Anonymous

Quote from: "Shen Li"Fuck, some good posts were lost. :mad:

Yes, it's unfortunate Shen..



I have been married for seventeen years and I thank the Lord for bringing us together..



I couldn't imagine going through this journey without him.

shin

Quote from: "Shen Li"Fuck, some good posts were lost. :mad:


I wish I had seen them.

shin

I think there must be a lot of good reasons for two friends to get married in the Western world



In the past, I've focused at the downside and often thought it didn't have a purpose to someone who wasn't planning on having kids.



I think marriage can work out well if both parties accept it as a partnership, first and foremost.

Anonymous

Quote from: "shin"I think there must be a lot of good reasons for two friends to get married in the Western world



In the past, I've focused at the downside and often thought it didn't have a purpose to someone who wasn't planning on having kids.



I think marriage can work out well if both parties accept it as a partnership, first and foremost.

Outside the Western world, marriage is practically a requirement for success.

Blazor

Quote from: "Shen Li"Fuck, some good posts were lost. :mad:


I typed my heart out in this thread  :laugh:



First time I hit max characters lol.
I've come here to chew bubble gum, and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum.

Blazor

Quote from: "shin"
Quote from: "Shen Li"Fuck, some good posts were lost. :mad:


I wish I had seen them.


Then maybe you should come around more often!  ac_razz
I've come here to chew bubble gum, and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum.

Anonymous

Quote from: "Blazor"
Quote from: "shin"
Quote from: "Shen Li"Fuck, some good posts were lost. :mad:


I wish I had seen them.


Then maybe you should come around more often!  ac_razz

I agree and it's nice to see you Blazor again.

 ac_hithere

Blazor

Quote from: "Fashionista"
I agree and it's nice to see you Blazor again.

 ac_hithere


You too Fash! And all the Cashews!  ac_drinks



Hopefully this place will be more cheery now  ac_smile
I've come here to chew bubble gum, and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum.

Anonymous

Quote from: "Blazor"
Quote from: "Fashionista"
I agree and it's nice to see you Blazor again.

 ac_hithere


You too Fash! And all the Cashews!  ac_drinks



Hopefully this place will be more cheery now  ac_smile

Now that the forum cancer has fucked off, it's already noticeably cheerier.