Australia is a cunt of a nation for takeaway/takeout/and overall general dining.

[Frood]

Almost EVERYTHING has a repurposed  theme.  They'll take a name from Europe or the Americas and glue it to an abomination approximation... so try to order a pizza with 5 toppings you like, 3 you cancel, and 1 or 2 you want added quantity of or other ingredients they never considered that people who KNOW pizza at the very foundation of Pizzatude just expect... "hey, remove a bunch of our ingredients we charge extra for if you ask for them? Cool... ask for garlic and that's three bucks, mate!"

And what's really bad is that these motherfucking business owners get repeat customers for things like chocolate and pineapple pizzas with cream cheese...

THAT'S NOT A FUCKING PIZZA, BRO. THAT'S SHIT MASQUERADING AS A SAVOURY ITALIAN PIE........AND WHY YOU GONNA CHARGE ME 38 BUCKS FOR THAT SHIT??? YOU'RE FUCKED IN THE HEAD.


....but wait.... it gets better in Australia.

EVERY MEXICAN INSPIRED RESTAURANT HERE IS REALLY A SHITTY FUCKING IMPERSONATION OF TEX-MEX FOODS...

ANYTHING wrapped in a fucking tortilla has "long grain rice" in it... wtfucking fuck? Rice is a fucking side dish, mate... and white long grain white rice isn't Tex mex.... it's your fucking filler for profit margins. Eat a bag of long grain rotting dog dicks!

But try to argue with the person taking your order that you don't want the rice IN the knockoff Tex Mex wrap...  but either on the side, or much more preferably in their garbage bin.

And these people get really fucking insulted.... like really snarky... things like, "your Mexican food will be much smaller if we aren't allowed to prepare it in a traditional way"... and I'm like BULLFUCKING SHIT MOTHERFUCKER... TEX MEX WAS BASTARDISED BUT YOU'RE JUST MAKING IT FUCKING INEDIBLE RIGHT NOW. RICE ON THE SIDE. IT'S GOING IN YOUR BIN OR MINE. I PREFER YOURS BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ONLY CHARGING ME 6 BUCKS TO DELIVER 1 MILE AWAY IN A REGIONAL TOWN, YOU'RE ACTUALLY CHARGING A FUCKING "SERVICE FEE" UP TO 4 BUCKS. WHO THE FUCK SERVICED MY FOOD BETWEEN WHEN IT GOT HANDED TO THE DRIVER AND THEN HANDED TO ME, CUNT???

SHOULD I GET A MOTHERFUCKING HIV TEST? AND WHY AREN'T YOU FUCKING PAYING FOR THAT?

Australian food (dine in/takeaway) is a hyperinflated endeavour... but what gets me spitting mad is how much they charge to fully fuck food... unless you're uncultured and don't know that there is no such thing as a Pittsburgh Burrito or Dakotas Pizza.... or no matter how many fucking times you put into your order notes.... "do not heat up or grill my fucking cold cut ordered hoagie/sub sandwich to a burnt mass of ass"... and these stupid motherfucking Aussies just keep doing it... (on the rare occasion they don't, one can see it's just cheap pizza mozzarella, crappy ham, cheap salami pretending to be pepperoni... all the things they put on their shitstastic fucking pizzas worth 30 bucks or better without ingredient changes... try 40 bucks when you weed out the nastiest shit which will make the average American projectile vomit in less than a minute.)

Guess some might be questioning this rant...and rightly so.

I've entirely gotten 3 takeouts today...

Breakfast: thin slice of ham and cheese on buttered thin wonder bread grilled toast.... 8 bucks

Lunch: standard cheese burger from a food van slathered in ketchup and fucking BBQ sauce? Wtf?? W/can of coke... 20 bucks

Dinner: Now I really stewed on getting fucked over twice before on this one, but I thought... you know what. Meat isn't going to dethaw quick...I have these days 2-3 times per year...and I'm all in for three fucking meals made by a rapist with no taste buds...

Went on Menulog in different windows and simultaneously started ordering things I might eat in the fields, got to payouts, compared all the shit... and went "FUCK YOU ALL! McDonald's only charges one fee, you can take things off your meals or put them on, with minimum cost, they offer slightly more healthier options in the combos...and I can get a reasonable fucking coffee out of it....)

This is what Australian food is... a whole lot of stupid tasteless peoples preying on the consumers too stupid to realise that they're stupid tasteless motherfuckers as well.

And if I have to eat a double quarter pounder with no ketchup, salt and pepper, but extra onions, mustard, and pickles tonight to support a multinational company that doesn't givea shit about health, yet offers fair pricing with a salad and long black coffee meal delivered without "service fees"... sign me up to Amazon!

The pizza I wanted was double the price. The Mexican grotesque, and don't get me started about the curry munchers...


So FUCK AUSTRALIAN FOOD ESTABLISHMENTS!

It's a predatory hyper inflated rape.

The ham and cheese was a buck at cost.

Hamburger, 5 bucks

I've been thinking about ripping this joint up with a gilded food van for decades... but then I realise, "They're too stupid to buy better quality foods served fast that don't taste like abortion and cost their 1st borns"...

And oh yeah, these stupid tastebud lacking Aussie motherfuckers use the power of socialism to block out free market minded people who ACTUALLY know how to make the foods these Aussies rape and then shit on.

***spit***

If you want to see Australian fauna, Americans... go to a fucking nearby zoo.

Don't give these fuckwits one fucking penny unless you must.

[caskur]

lol at your $20 lunch.... they rubbed their hands when they saw you coming.

Make your own lunch ya lazy bastard!~

[caskur]

PS, the food in Australia?... well the standards are VERY low.

[DKG]

I would have thought a mulitcultural nation like Australia had first rate dining choices.

[Shen Li]

I bought fried chicken today from Jollibee. It's a Filipino chain. It was decidedly average.

[Reggie Essent]

I tried that Vegemite fungus that Aussies spread on their toast one time.  It was the most disgusting thing I ever ate.  It took a week to wash the taste of that filth out of my mouth.

[Shen Li]

I tried that Vegemite fungus that Aussies spread on their toast one time.  It was the most disgusting thing I ever ate.  It took a week to wash the taste of that filth out of my mouth.

Ha ha, me 2.

[Reggie Essent]

Ha ha, me 2.

Seriously!  Isn't that stuff awful.  It smells like black mold growing in a dank and dirty basement and tastes 15 times worse.

[caskur]

I tried that Vegemite fungus that Aussies spread on their toast one time.  It was the most disgusting thing I ever ate.  It took a week to wash the taste of that filth out of my mouth.

First of all try PROMITE... then if and when you do try it, you put the most miniscule amount with plenty of butter and some cheese on a cracker or piece of bread. You probably tried it too thick ....

[caskur]

I would have thought a mulitcultural nation like Australia had first rate dining choices.

Our best produce is exported... the best produce at home goes to restaurants where you pay an arm and a leg then we are stuck with supermarkets.

[Reggie Essent]

First of all try PROMITE... then if and when you do try it, you put the most miniscule amount with plenty of butter and some cheese on a cracker or piece of bread. You probably tried it too thick ....

I spread it like peanut butter on a hot piece of toast and took a huge bite.  I spit that shit right out all over the table.  It was horrible.  Spend like 4 bucks on the jar of that gunk too.  I don't think I want to try anything else from Australia with "MITE" in the name.

I did get some packaged lamb chops from there once at a specialty store with exotic meats from all over the world.  They were quite tasty.

[Shen Li]

I don't like any spreads. Peanut butter, vegemite., mayo or anything cheese or chocolate.

[caskur]

I spread it like peanut butter on a hot piece of toast and took a huge bite.  I spit that shit right out all over the table.  It was horrible.  Spend like 4 bucks on the jar of that gunk too.  I don't think I want to try anything else from Australia with "MITE" in the name.

I did get some packaged lamb chops from there once at a specialty store with exotic meats from all over the world.  They were quite tasty.

Had you been given it the way we give it to babies you would have been hooked.

I think Frood loves it he was converted lol...

[caskur]

I don't like any spreads. Peanut butter, vegemite., mayo or anything cheese or chocolate.

Our famous spread now is smash an avo (avocado) on toast...

[Reggie Essent]

Had you been given it the way we give it to babies you would have been hooked.

I think Frood loves it he was converted lol...

Here in the States we do that with peanut butter.  Thank God we had a black fella named Carver that figured out what to do with goober peas that grow like weeds down south.  I can't imagine growing up without peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.  On white bread, of course.

It does seem from the OP rant that Frood still remembers what pizza is supposed to be..