Free Range Parenting

[@realAzhyaAryola]

[size=200]Child neglect charges ruled out for Maryland 'free-range' parents[/size]



http://www.cnn.com/2015/05/26/living/feat-maryland-free-range-parents-child-neglect/index.html">http://www.cnn.com/2015/05/26/living/fe ... index.html">http://www.cnn.com/2015/05/26/living/feat-maryland-free-range-parents-child-neglect/index.html



The Maryland "free-range" parents at the center of a national debate over parental supervision have been cleared of child neglect charges related to an incident in December in which their children, ages 6 and 10, were allowed to walk home alone from a playground a mile from their house.



However, Danielle and Alexander Meitiv of Silver Spring are still under investigation for a similar episode last month in which their children were picked up by authorities while walking home alone and detained for several hours.



The couple's attorney hailed the ruling by Child Protective Services of Montgomery County.



"I think this most recent conclusion by CPS validates our position all along that the Meitivs were never responsible for any form of child neglect and there was no basis to investigate the family or detain the children," Matthew Dowd said, adding that the family was notified via letter last week.



The agency had originally found the parents responsible for "unsubstantiated neglect" in March.



In the December incident, the two children were about halfway through their walk home when they were stopped by police, Danielle Meitiv said. When officers asked whether they were lost or in trouble, the kids told them they were fine, that their parents knew where they were and that they are allowed to walk home by themselves, she said.



The police drove the kids home. A few hours later, someone from Child Protective Services arrived at the home and said the family needed to agree not to let the children be unsupervised until the matter was resolved within the agency, or the children would be taken into the custody of Child Protective Services, said Meitiv.



"The family did appeal, and they were successful in their appeal," Maryland Department of Human Resources spokeswoman Paula Tolson said, explaining that she could not comment any further because it remains an open case.

[@realAzhyaAryola]

The Meitivs are still under investigation for an April 19 incident that also garnered national attention. On that day, their children were detained -- first by police officers and then by CPS -- for hours after they were again found walking home alone from a park.



"The April case is going through the process," Tolson said. She said the agency has 60 days to conclude its investigation and issue a written decision.



While the Meitivs await those results, they are moving forward with plans to file a lawsuit against Montgomery County Police and Child Protective Services stemming from the April incident, Dowd said.



"The past actions of CPS and Montgomery County Police violated the rights of the Meitivs and their children," he said.



In a new statement, Danielle Meitiv said that while she and her family welcome the most recent decision by CPS, they are concerned that a "misguided policy" remains in place.



"We fear that our family and other Maryland families will be subject to further investigations and frightening police detentions simply because our and their children have been been taught how to walk safely in their neighborhood including to and from school and local parks," she said.



Added Dowd, "The question is ... if someone calls in the future, whether an investigation will be started all over again. And right now, the Meitivs don't have any certainty and don't have any clarity about that issue."



Do you think the free-range parents in this story should still be under investigation? Share your thoughts with Kelly Wallace on Twitter @kellywallacetv or CNN Parents on Facebook.

[@realAzhyaAryola]

While I find it is beautiful to teach children to walk home without supervision, hello, we live in a very different age now where children could be abducted and sold as child sex slaves or simply slaves. Perhaps there's something to be said about not worrying about everything under the sun but really? Really? What if they were picked up by these unsavory characters? Then we have a catastrophe in our hands. We would be searching for these abducted children and then grieving over their disappearance if they are never found. To me, this is tempting fate.

[RW]

I don't understand - what have these parents done wrong?



Asia, the world is no more scary than it was when I was young.  I grew up in the time of Clifford Olsen FFS.  We are so much more paranoid now because we hear about it more often.  As a result, parents hover over their kids giving them no room to grow.

[@realAzhyaAryola]

6 and 10 to me are still too young to be on their own walking for a mile, RW. I'm not a paranoid parent. My sons are 16 and 21 now and when they were 6 and 10, they were confident boys who were never clingy and I gave them a bit of freedom as well. Both boys happily went into their day care centers on their first days without looking back. What a relief for me not having to worry about clingy children and I was able to go back to work worry-free. However, I don't think I am comfortable with my 6 and 10 year old walking a mile to get home. Sorry, I don't buy into that complacency. The world IS scarier now than ever before.



They were asked not to let their kids walk home on their own until further notice but they did not comply.

[Annie]

I think 6 is a little young but the 10 year old probably ok and they were together.  But a mile is a bit far. The world is just as scary as 20 years ago.  Like RW said, we just hear about it more (because of social media) When I was growing up we came across a few unsavory characters. From the streaker in the bushes at elementary school to serial killer, Clifford Olson.  But if kids were taught back then and now, know what to do, they should be ok.   I was taught in school and by older siblings about stranger danger and I taught our kids, it worked. Kids need their freedom but it's hard to say to what extent, it depends on the children and their intellect and what they've been taught.

[RW]

6 and 10 to me are still too young to be on their own walking for a mile, RW. I'm not a paranoid parent. My sons are 16 and 21 now and when they were 6 and 10, they were confident boys who were never clingy and I gave them a bit of freedom as well. Both boys happily went into their day care centers on their first days without looking back. What a relief for me not having to worry about clingy children and I was able to go back to work worry-free. However, I don't think I am comfortable with my 6 and 10 year old walking a mile to get home. Sorry, I don't buy into that complacency. The world IS scarier now than ever before.



They were asked not to let their kids walk home on their own until further notice but they did not comply.

Who is the government to dictate how far their kids can walk and at what age?  My kids walk more than a mile on their own and they are 10.  No one bats an eye about it either.



The world isn't all that different from when I was a kid - at least not that I have noticed yet we are more paranoid.  Why is that?  Oh right - access to a constant barrage of bad news stories.

[Renee]

This is the kind of government over reach that is rampant in the US today. The world is no more dangerous today than it was 30 years ago. Our government as well as our public schools are all in the business of parenting when in most cases they are the least qualified to do so.

[@realAzhyaAryola]

Different strokes for different folks. No one can convince me to feel different about this matter. I listen to my gut on these matters so I will swim against the tide.



I am happy for a civilization that has a system such as Child Protective Services because there are far too many irresponsible parents who commit crimes against their very own children. There are countries that don't care to make children a concern so I'm happy I live in one that does. I never take that for granted.



I would let these 6 and 10 year old kids on my watch walk for a mile, provided I'm walking with them or following right behind them.



No child, 6 or 10, on my watch, will be walking for one mile by themselves. I will drive them to the place they desire to go. There are plenty of other lessons they can learn from on how to do things on their own but not this, if I can help it. Showing children that you trust them and allow them opportunities to mature is positive, no doubt, but there are other ways of doing so.



I did not teach my children that our neighborhood was unsafe. They walked with me daily up and down our neighborhood after supper for many years. They walked home alone from school but they were older than 6 and 10. Thirty or twenty years ago, there was not as much human trafficking as there is today. I do not dismiss those Amber Alerts. What about those captive women who were raped and bore their captors's children? Some of these women were abducted when they were very young. We have very sick elements in our societies. Each time I see those amber alerts, I get really angry. I was never a parent who hovered over my children but I am also [size=200]NOT[/size] convinced free range parenting is the supreme way. Fear should not rule our decisions but common sense should.



I would be real upset if one day I see these same free range parents crying on national TV saying, "Please help us find our children. We have not seen them in 48 hours." I'm going to be real pissed off when that ever happens knowing that it could have been prevented.

[Renee]

Azhya, I agree with you on many points. I'm not convinced that this so-called "free range parenting" is the way to go either. I think it needs to be viewed on a case by case basis. Like all people this is an example of each to his or her own gifts. The situation depends entirely on where it is taking place and the maturity and situational awareness level of the children in question. I would never let a 6 year old child walk unsupervised anywhere, even in my own front yard. But if they were in the company of an older sibling the situation can change depending in the responsibility level of that older sibling. Granted 10 years old may seem a little young to be allowed to walk a mile home from a playground but I've seen 10 year old kids that are perfectly capable of doing so (my oldest daughter for example). Then again I've seen 10 year old children who I wouldn't let 20 feet out of my sight without some kind of GPS tracking device implanted in their ass (my number 3 child for example).



My main beef with this is the fact that we live in a world where the government, the schools, and societies self appointed watch dogs think that they have a right to run every single facet of our lives without regard for individual liberty and personal responsibility. If I or you want to allow our children to walk home alone or jump off the roof with a home made parachute, that is no ones business but our own. At this very moment we have schools writing politically motivated letters to parents scolding them over everything from the kind of lunch they pack for their kid, to the kind of clothes they are allowed to wear, to how much there child weighs and I say that's bullshit. We have government agency and municipalities denying taxpayers access to public buildings because of political statements on the tee-shirts and all kinds of stupid shit like that. Who the fuck are these people and where do they come off thinking that they were given the authority to do such shit? Who gets to decide what is dangerous for my child and what isn't. This publicly funded authoritative communal style raising of children is fucking BULLSHIT. We have gotten so wrapped up and intimidated by anyone who calls themselves a child expert or child safety advocate that we are little by little turning over or rights and responsibilities as parents to do our jobs. This shit has to stop, I cannot stress that enough!



Government intrusion into our lives is at an all time high in the US. You cannot even dig a freaking hole in your back yard without first checking with some government agency or department and nine times out of ten, it is only so that that agency can extort money out of you and justify their existence by hassling you. I have a feeling this is another case of a government agency trying to justify it's existence. If in this town the only thing the child protection authorities have to do is investigate and persecute a family for letting their kids walk home from a playground, then I say there is no need for that agency to exist in the first place.  



I apologize for getting all foamy, Azhya. It really has nothing to do with your position on this; it's just that this kind of shit burns my ass. acc_angry

[Renee]

(Edit)

[RW]

Asia, when I was young, there were abductions and rape, molestation and murder - no different to what there is now.  You just hear about it more because in the U.S., you have 24/7 news.  Human trafficking and all that other shit isn't a new thing.



I live in the toolies.  I have no problem with my kids travelling unaccompanied a mile from home.  I see many parents who allow the same.  I refuse to live in a world where the tv makes me paranoid and I respect these parents for sticking to their guns and saying FUCK YOU to the government.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand - what have these parents done wrong?

Exactly!!

[Odinson]

Its still pretty safe for a kid to walk home alone in here but thats changing thanks to shitbags.

[@realAzhyaAryola]

Sure, I agree with some of your points as well, Renee and RW, especially about overbearing government programs but I take into consideration the other nations today that make no accommodations for children whatsoever. Perhaps our society cares too much. Some countries "don't care." I am glad we care at all and I am grateful for that.



I am not debating whether there were more predators in the past than now. I know the world had predators for centuries and hearing about them more now through high tech means and social media does not make it less of a concern, in my opinion.



In the end, I'm just voicing my views. I don't want to tell another parent how to parent their children because I won't welcome another parent telling me how I ought to parent mine. Also, in the event some parents lose their children through neglect or through free range principles, I will feel bad for them and then remind myself that it is, after all, not my problem.