Don't buy Charmin toilet paper...

[Anonymous]

It's a massive toilet clogger.  Better have yer plunger handy.  I forgot how bad it was, until I picked up a package of it on sale.  Purex or Royal two-ply won't clog up yer shitter as easily.

[cc]

I don't know how I'd survive without your sharing your  interest and expertise in shit and things that revolve around it



To me, and I'm sure to many,  you are a savior



With this new knowledge and speaking for myself, Charmin will never touch my bum nor my shitter

[Anonymous]

I only buy Tiger brand toilet paper.

[Frood]

Just jump in the shower after... save the trees!

[Anonymous]

Just jump in the shower after... save the trees!

Have you ever taken a shit in the shower?  I have!  Let me tell you, it's a heavenly experience...  Warm water running off your back while spraying the most toxic explosive sludge out of the ass into tub...  Pure heaven!

[Frood]

Just jump in the shower after... save the trees!

Have you ever taken a shit in the shower?  I have!  Let me tell you, it's a heavenly experience...  Warm water running off your back while spraying the most toxic explosive sludge out of the ass into tub...  Pure heaven!

You should try pinching off a log while diving...

[Anonymous]

You should try pinching off a log while diving...

Is that like pissing in the pool?  I've pissed in the pool, but have enough decency not to shit in the pool!  I guess shitting in a river or an open body of water is OK though...

[Renee]

Just jump in the shower after... save the trees!

Have you ever taken a shit in the shower?  I have!  Let me tell you, it's a heavenly experience...  Warm water running off your back while spraying the most toxic explosive sludge out of the ass into tub...  Pure heaven!

In college I had a roommate that used to get shitfaced every Friday and Saturday night and she would come back to the dorm, take a shower and sometimes shit herself  in the shower (classy chick).



More than once I caught her trying to push the turds down through the grate that covered the drain. It's commonly referred to as "The Waffle Stomp".



BTW, maybe you use too much TP. Maybe if your asshole didn't look like 3 pounds of ground chuck, you wouldn't need to use so much paper.

[Frood]

You should try pinching off a log while diving...

Is that like pissing in the pool?  I've pissed in the pool, but have enough decency not to shit in the pool!  I guess shitting in a river or an open body of water is OK though...

Open sea... dive down, wrap your trunks around your knees and fire away...





...only problem is that your turd is much more buoyant than the surrounding water and depth...so, without gravity to cut the turd off at the exit point, you're an underwater dragon with a shit tail...



..and every time you try to come up for air, you're hugging your sea shit snake...

[Blazor]

This thread  



All y'all have said some pretty funny "shit" lol.



Reminds me of this meme...

[Anonymous]

You should try pinching off a log while diving...

Is that like pissing in the pool?  I've pissed in the pool, but have enough decency not to shit in the pool!

[Anonymous]

BTW, maybe you use too much TP. Maybe if your asshole didn't look like 3 pounds of ground chuck, you wouldn't need to use so much paper.

No, I use a lot of paper because I demand a clean ass!  Wasn't it a fellow American of yours, Alyssa Milano, that was pushing your nation to use only one (1) square of toilet paper per shit?



Stay shitty with your one square wipe, Renee!

[Anonymous]

Mel, you must use TP like my son does, stop! My great grandfather (who survived the Depression) taught me to use 2 squares at a time, and use most the square. Dont get me wrong, the first 2 folded over squares only get one swipe, cause that takes off the bulk. But after that, you dont need much more. I prolly only use 10 squares, and I wipe til its white lol.

There's just no way I can make that happen...  I pull sheets of paper off the roll like there's no tomorrow!  Sometimes it pays to be frugal, but just not in this case!  Sometimes I'll fold it three or four times over, but only use it once!  Wasteful, I know, but old habits are hard to break...  

[Biggie Smiles]

Great thread Mel.





Good thing you're here to clog the board with the forum equivalent of Charmin toilet paper.



Only thing is we all know you wipe your funky ass with your barehand and lick your fingers when you're done.

[Anonymous]

Great thread Mel.

Thanks.  Sharing knowledge is always a very admirable thing to do!



Oh, and you're not actually communicating with the real 'Mel' in that Admin thread...  That's another poster!