Babylon Bee, People's Cube etc.

[Renee]

I would never refer to Justine in a masculine way either. That's just common sense.

That was a part of what I also was hinting at with "I could think of a few appropriate pronouns for him"  

We elected him and we will do it again.

Don't feel bad. Look at the trainwreck that we elected. At least yours is has a pulse...On second thought, I'm not sure if that's good or bad.

Ours is guaranteed to be reelected unlike Joe Biden.

Well yours didn't get "shushed" like a child at the G2 by some douche with hair worse than Trumps...Talk about embarrassing and I don't mean Boris Johnsons hair.



And just look at that meeting with Putin...Talk about appearing weak. Obama's first foreign policy tour is known as the "Apology Tour" and people are ready calling Biden's first foreign policy tour as the "I Surrender Tour".



 Hang on because it's going to be a bumpy ride...Expect Russia to pull off a full scale invasion of the Ukraine, China to squeeze the last remaining breath out of Taiwan and the Iranians to go full nuclear and dozens more cyber ransom attacks, all while the US diddles around with, reparations, wokeism, gender pronouns, hurt feelings, and just pure progressive/socialist/ radical leftist, idiocy,.. socially, economically and militarily.



We are in the midst of an unmitigated disaster all because 80 million TDS infected retards had their jimmies rustled by Trump real and or imagined. Someone needs to be held accountable for this and unfortunately it needs to be the dumbass American voter. Everyone who voted for this coporlite in the Oval Office needs to be burned at the stake..."canceled" and I don't mean having their social media page removed. They are a danger to not only the US but to the world as well. We have come to a crossroads in America where letting stupid people vote has global consequences and something needs to be done about it...This universal suffrage garbage is a detriment to the human race.

[Anonymous]

I'm curious, which leader do you mean if not Boris Johnson?

[cc]

It has to be her own .. the  creepy hair sniffer

Obama's first foreign policy tour is known as the "Apology Tour" and people are ready calling Biden's first foreign policy tour as the "I Surrender Tour".

Good comparison and accurate  statement

[Anonymous]

It has to be her own .. the  creepy hair sniffer

Obama's first foreign policy tour is known as the "Apology Tour" and people are ready calling Biden's first foreign policy tour as the "I Surrender Tour".

Good comparison and accurate  statement

It's no longer America and Americans first.

[Anonymous]

Female Weightlifter Suffers Tragic Testicle Injury Just Weeks Before Tokyo Olympics



WELLINGTON, NEW ZEALAND—100% totally female weightlifter Laurel Hubbard was forced to bid farewell to her Olympic dreams yesterday after a tragic accident left her with a severely lacerated testicle. Hubbard would have been the first transgender woman to compete in the Olympics.



The injury is not life-threatening, but doctors have advised Hubbard that she needs to refrain from heavy lifting for at least six to eight weeks as her injury heals. Obviously, that means Olympic weightlifting is off the table.



Hubbard was something of a controversial figure at this year's games given that she was born a biological male and competed as a male weightlifter until 2013. Many critics argued that this gave her an unfair advantage compared to female weightlifters, but Hubbard says that's ridiculous.



"Sure, there are some biological differences like bone density and muscle strength between the sexes," Hubbard said. "But none of those gives me an unfair advantage in weightlifting, which is really more about finesse and technique!"



Hubbard said while she's disappointed she won't be able to live out her Olympic dreams this year, that's just the way it goes. "Sometimes your testicles get in the way," Hubbard said. "That's just something we gals have to deal with."

https://babylonbee.com/news/female-weightlifter-suffers-tragic-testicle-injury-just-weeks-before-tokyo-olympics">https://babylonbee.com/news/female-weig ... o-olympics">https://babylonbee.com/news/female-weightlifter-suffers-tragic-testicle-injury-just-weeks-before-tokyo-olympics

[cc]

That is funny

[Anonymous]

Female Weightlifter Suffers Tragic Testicle Injury Just Weeks Before Tokyo Olympics



WELLINGTON, NEW ZEALAND—100% totally female weightlifter Laurel Hubbard was forced to bid farewell to her Olympic dreams yesterday after a tragic accident left her with a severely lacerated testicle. Hubbard would have been the first transgender woman to compete in the Olympics.



The injury is not life-threatening, but doctors have advised Hubbard that she needs to refrain from heavy lifting for at least six to eight weeks as her injury heals. Obviously, that means Olympic weightlifting is off the table.



Hubbard was something of a controversial figure at this year's games given that she was born a biological male and competed as a male weightlifter until 2013. Many critics argued that this gave her an unfair advantage compared to female weightlifters, but Hubbard says that's ridiculous.



"Sure, there are some biological differences like bone density and muscle strength between the sexes," Hubbard said. "But none of those gives me an unfair advantage in weightlifting, which is really more about finesse and technique!"



Hubbard said while she's disappointed she won't be able to live out her Olympic dreams this year, that's just the way it goes. "Sometimes your testicles get in the way," Hubbard said. "That's just something we gals have to deal with."

https://babylonbee.com/news/female-weightlifter-suffers-tragic-testicle-injury-just-weeks-before-tokyo-olympics">https://babylonbee.com/news/female-weig ... o-olympics">https://babylonbee.com/news/female-weightlifter-suffers-tragic-testicle-injury-just-weeks-before-tokyo-olympics

Sometimes I forget Babylon is all satire.

[cc]

Sometimes I forget Babylon is all satire.

Ya. That weightlifter one ^^ was a goody





https://babylonbee.com/news/cdc-still-baffled-people-are-paying-attention-to-them">CDC Still Baffled People Are Paying Attention To Them



ATLANTA, GA—The CDC has once again changed course, recommending that people wear masks indoors, even those who have received the COVID-19 vaccination. Many people have reacted angrily to this decision—greatly confusing the CDC, which is used to being completely ignored.



"This whole pandemic has been bizarre for us," said CDC spokesman Dexter Park. "Normally, we put out recommendations like only cook a steak well-done and only fry eggs over-hard, and people don't even pay enough attention to make fun of us, so people acting like what we say during the pandemic matters is really confusing."



The CDC is a group of bureaucrats used to working a 9-to-5 job of complete pointlessness, making lists of recommendations that are fated to be crumpled up and thrown in a wastepaper basket. Thus, the pandemic turning them into experts whose opinions matter has caught them completely by surprise.



"People keep saying our suggestions on masking are dumb and make no sense," said CDC regulator Lyle Howell. "But that's all of our suggestions on everything. We have to keep making recommendations, though, to justify our existence and get a budget. But no one listens to them—not even us. So can't you all just go back to ignoring us and stop yelling at us? I'm just here until I get my pension."

[Anonymous]

I like this thread.

 

[cc]

https://babylonbee.com/news/wrestler-stripped-of-gold-medal-after-pro-usa-comments-surfacel">Wrestler Stripped Of Gold Medal After Pro-USA Comments Surface



https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/article-9190-1.jpg">



TOKYO—Olympic wrestler Tamyra Mensah-Stock was stripped of her gold medal Thursday after several of the athlete's pro-USA comments were circulated online. A spokesman for the United States Olympic Committee (USOC) said there's no place for that type of vulgar language in sports today.



"The United States Olympic Committee stands for pretty much the opposite of what the United States of America stands for," the spokesman said in a prepared statement. "We have enacted a strict no-patriotism policy for the Tokyo games which all athletes are required to uphold."



Ms. Mensah-Stock was already on probation with the USOC for failing to kneel during the national anthem. "Since her pro-USA comments were her second offense in as many days, we had no choice but to strip her of her gold medal," the spokesman said.  



Mensah-Stock's controversial comments came in an interview immediately following her gold medal performance. "I love representing the US," she squealed. "I freaking love living there. I love it and I'm so happy I get to represent the USA!"



For her part, Mensah-Stock says she was caught up in the moment and didn't realize what she was saying. "I got excited and lost my head for a minute," she said in a prepared apology as a laser dot danced around on her forehead. "As a black woman and a role model, the last thing I ever wanted to do was give the impression that I'm proud to be an American."

[Thiel]

Wrestler Stripped Of Gold Medal After Pro-USA Comments Surface



https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/article-9190-1.jpg">https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/a ... 9190-1.jpg">https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/article-9190-1.jpg[/img]



TOKYO—Olympic wrestler Tamyra Mensah-Stock was stripped of her gold medal Thursday after several of the athlete's pro-USA comments were circulated online. A spokesman for the United States Olympic Committee (USOC) said there's no place for that type of vulgar language in sports today.



"The United States Olympic Committee stands for pretty much the opposite of what the United States of America stands for," the spokesman said in a prepared statement. "We have enacted a strict no-patriotism policy for the Tokyo games which all athletes are required to uphold."



Ms. Mensah-Stock was already on probation with the USOC for failing to kneel during the national anthem. "Since her pro-USA comments were her second offense in as many days, we had no choice but to strip her of her gold medal," the spokesman said.  



Mensah-Stock's controversial comments came in an interview immediately following her gold medal performance. "I love representing the US," she squealed. "I freaking love living there. I love it and I'm so happy I get to represent the USA!"



For her part, Mensah-Stock says she was caught up in the moment and didn't realize what she was saying. "I got excited and lost my head for a minute," she said in a prepared apology as a laser dot danced around on her forehead. "As a black woman and a role model, the last thing I ever wanted to do was give the impression that I'm proud to be an American."

lol, she's a Trump supporting fascist.

[cc]

LOL @ Thiel ^





Maybe here I can stick last nights miracle on track



Yes, Andre does it again in the 4 man 400  m relay - watch start position with 100 to go and then & his finish position



Took baton in 5th position... poured it on as only he can and grabbed a bronze for his team



Andre - in 2 years, 6 Olympic starts - 6 medals (100, 200 Gold & then team relay)

[Anonymous]

LOL @ Thiel ^





Maybe here I can stick last nights miracle on track



Yes, Andre does it again in the 4 man 400  m relay - watch start position with 100 to go and then & his finish position



Took baton in 5th position... poured it on as only he can and grabbed a bronze for his team



Andre - in 2 years, 6 Olympic starts - 6 medals (100, 200 Gold & then team relay)

[cc]

https://babylonbee.com/news/obama-party-ruined-as-mansion-sinks-into-sea-thanks-to-climate-change">TRAGEDY - Obama's Party Ruined As Mansion Sinks Into Sea Thanks To Climate Change



https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/article-9210-1.jpg">



MARTHA'S VINEYARD, MA—Well, this is tragic news: Barack Obama's long-awaited birthday bash has been ruined by climate change as his mansion sank into the sea thanks to global warming.



As guests participated in the activities, from fun games like "Pin the Drone on the Middle Eastern Country" to a rousing session of Settlers of Yemen, the sound of crashing water caused everyone to run outside. "Oh no!" shouted Hillary Clinton. "We've gotta cheese it—it's climate change!"



"How dare you!" shouted Greta Thunberg, lecturing the wave on how it's just supposed to consume evil white men.



"Aw, man!" said a disappointed Obama as he swam away. "I was looking forward to that Predator drone-shaped cake—it looked delicious!"



"I knew I shouldn't have invested in a $12 million-dollar mansion when I've warned people over and over again that it would be underwater in just a few years."



Many guests were soaked or swept away into the sea, though John Kerry and Al Gore called their pilots and got picked up in their private jets.



At publishing time, Obama had purchased yet another multi-million-dollar mansion on the new Atlantic coast in eastern Kansas.

[Anonymous]

https://server9.kproxy.com/servlet/redirect.srv/sruj/snomzbznrrt/p2/news/obama-party-ruined-as-mansion-sinks-into-sea-thanks-to-climate-change">TRAGEDY - Obama's Party Ruined As Mansion Sinks Into Sea Thanks To Climate Change



https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/article-9210-1.jpg">



MARTHA'S VINEYARD, MA—Well, this is tragic news: Barack Obama's long-awaited birthday bash has been ruined by climate change as his mansion sank into the sea thanks to global warming.



As guests participated in the activities, from fun games like "Pin the Drone on the Middle Eastern Country" to a rousing session of Settlers of Yemen, the sound of crashing water caused everyone to run outside. "Oh no!" shouted Hillary Clinton. "We've gotta cheese it—it's climate change!"



"How dare you!" shouted Greta Thunberg, lecturing the wave on how it's just supposed to consume evil white men.



"Aw, man!" said a disappointed Obama as he swam away. "I was looking forward to that Predator drone-shaped cake—it looked delicious!"



"I knew I shouldn't have invested in a $12 million-dollar mansion when I've warned people over and over again that it would be underwater in just a few years."



Many guests were soaked or swept away into the sea, though John Kerry and Al Gore called their pilots and got picked up in their private jets.



At publishing time, Obama had purchased yet another multi-million-dollar mansion on the new Atlantic coast in eastern Kansas.